That's When

    When you stub your toe and nobody hears you say ouch; when a mousetrap snaps and leaves its victim alive and you have to deal with it; when it's cold and rainy outside but no one else is around to bring in the newspaper, or put out the garbage; when the cat appears to have a toothache and you have to decide what to do; when you read something amusing in the newspaper, or see something troubling on TV, and there's nobody to share the news with; when you know your car needs to be inspected or registered or whatever, and you realize you're the one responsible for seeing it gets done; when you answer the phone, and your voice is raspy because you haven't talked to anyone all day; when you see a sloppy stain on the counter or a spill in the refrigerator, and you know there's no one to blame but yourself; when you watch  television late at night and keep the volume low so as not to disturb anybody; when you're grocery shopping and buy the usual items, and realize no one is there to eat them; when you empty an  almost full half gallon container of milk down the drain because it's outdated on the same day you toss half a loaf of bread under the birdfeeder for the same reason; when you know you're alone in the house, but still hear, or feel, someone calling your name; when you can watch whatever you want on TV because it's not tuned to the Boston Red Sox Channel; when you hear a noise in the night, and it's up to you to check it out; when you  need to buy only half as much detergent  or dishwasher cleaner because you're not running the machines as often; when you're wearing something new and there's no one to comment; when you have one of those rare but terrifying nightmares where your entire body goes cold,and there's no one to comfort you;  when you answer an entire Jeopardy category correctly with no one to flaunt your prowess to; and when there is nobody to say Good Morning when you wake up-----that's when you know you live alone.