Glamor and Crud

The Red Carpet at the Oscars----a parade, no, a contrived modeling venue for attractive  actresses clad in expensive designer gowns.  For us viewers, a study in beauty, the panorama of success and good fortune.   Except the vision is marred by the actresses themselves, who voluntarily destroy the illusion so sought after by the designers and fashion houses.  We hear one gorgeous specimen say she is feeling dehydrated as she could not drink anything because her gown is so fitted she is not able to pee while wearing it.  Another complains of not being able to breathe because the Spanx she needs to wear under her dress is compressing her insides.  The word "bloated" is freely cast around: it seems eating has to be suspended for at least several days before the Red Carpet walk.  Most will not sit while wearing the dress, either because the dress won't allow that movement, or wrinkling will destroy its appearance.  The stances are tortuous exercises of posing to display desired portions of side boobs, errant nipples, cleavage and thighs.  The choice of shoes is another factor in the flawed illusion of beauty: with public displays of hobbling, tripping, stumbling, and falling, few would aspire to emulate what appears on that red carpet.  Appearance is the presumed feature of the night, but bodily functions prevail.