This is the way the grant goes...

In our present and ongoing situation, we are naturally pursuing all avenues of help.  Last year, one of the Medicare reps left me a sheet with a list of resources. One was the Dept. of Aging.  I called and they were out of funding for the year, didn't know when they would have more available.
     A few weeks ago, out of the blue,  a man named Vinnie called and said that there was a "huge grant" available for someone in our situation.  He gave me the contact number and I called and spoke to Rep#1 who said I'd have to contact Rep #2 .  That rep called and scheduled a telephone conference with Rep #3. Those calls resulted in 2 home visits by 2 different reps--possibly some of the former, but I've kind of lost track, though somewhere there are the memos.  So we've withstood the intake visits and I've managed to stay sociable I must say,through all the duplicate questionnaire requirements.
    Rep #2 referred me to a facility that had nothing to do with the grant.  Rep #3 at the end of her visit indicates I need to contact----wait for it----none other than Rep #1.  She later emails about the confusion, and that she will get back to me next week, as she won't be in the office Friday, though she's leaving the message Thurs. morning.  (Long weekend?) Seems like nobody is in the  office on Fridays.
    Now my challenge is this:   how to keep my pleasant demeanor while telling them that there is no confusion on my part, despite the idiotic trail of information they've set forth. I want one thing:   Respite care of a day and a night so I can comfortably undergo a medical procedure, "caretaker" that I am. That is one of the written purposes of this particular grant,and it would be a very small fraction of the "huge" grant.
   Grants, huge or modest, have a history of being depleted before their goals are reached. How?  By involving numerous levels of staff in duplicate activities, which expends the funding before it ever reaches its target goal. Home visits are a favored activity, though the telephone would answer most of the questions, which are unnecessary deadends anyway.  But staff time and mileage are included in those visits.  And, oh, a tote bag, and gadgets,  emblazoned with the logo of the agency. (Does anyone on the planet need another tote bag?) Not much can be more self-evident of self-promoting  the entity than to be circled back to the person who sent you on the chase.
     If we were to benefit from the "huge grant"the total amount paid  would be about $250-$300, depending on how much respite.  That amount would be dwarfed by the expenses incurred by all the staff employed to administer the grant. And that's where the money goes.
      I'll keep plodding though and be grateful for any largesse.  And can anyone use a tote bag?