I have a friend whose husband was diagnosed with the deadly disease of pancreatitis. During his last hospitalization, the tremendous level of his pain was thankfully alleviated through hospice services. His wife viewed Hospice as almost a divine intervention which ultimately ended his agony.
My husband's terminal neurological disease impacted his ability to sleep or rest, as he needed to call out for comfort of some sort every few hours, during the night time. The doctor at the Vermont Hospital arranged for him to have someone attend him throughout the nighttime hours, so his callouts would not disturb the sleep of other nearby patients. That was an ideal solution until other patients were no longer nearby, and so the overnight attendance was withdrawn. He missed that service and wished it could be reinstated. The best solution the presiding doctor could offer was to submit him as a patient to Hospice. A representative from Hospice showed up to enroll him, a young woman who was friendly, talkative, telling me details about her baby son, and obviously eager to enroll him as a patient. We did so.
Unfortunately, the hospice services did not allow him to have the nighttime attendant he had so wanted, but we kept him on anyway.
Not too long afterwards, an aide left him poised on the edge of the bed while she turned away to get some supplies, and he rolled off onto the floor, hitting his head and opening a gash, and probably losing consciousness for a time. He was taken by ambulance to the nearest hospital. In the early hours of that morning, I received a telephone call from the neurologist who had been called in to assess his condition. He asked me if I wanted him to have a CT Scan of his head to see if there was any internal bleeding. I said yes, and the scan was done.That was the beginning of the end of his being a hospice patient.
For Hospice is a comprehensive holistic program of care and support for terminally ill patients and their families, with the focus on palliative care for pain and symptoms instead of care aimed to cure the illness.The neurologist said Dave's scan would not fall under coverage by hospice, and I said then remove him from hospice. He complied.
The rep from Hospice showed up, asking about the issue. She was curt, almost hostile. I explained that falling out of bed was not a symptom of his illness, but an accident, and I supported my action; if that was inconsistent with her hospice affiliation, so be it. As she was leaving, I asked her how her son was; she answered in one word, as she walked out the door---"growing" was all she said.
My take on hospice would be that it is a business, founded on the principle of keeping the terminally ill out of the hospital, and medical expenses, primarily unnecessary as not life-prolonging, to a minimum. Different states have different rules for hospices to abide by, as do differing localities. I would say that hospices operate about the same as any franchise, with the ability to choose one over another. Experiences vary, as per those cited above. But Hospice is not certified by angelic sources to descend on the suffering and manage their entry into the great beyond.
Have encountered a number of these wunderkinds of late, young of course, or recently young, and mostly male. They are exceptionally clever beings: educated, professional, courteous, adept in conversation, quite charming. And they don't seem to mind engaging with you for a generous period of time.
I would say they approach the standard of perfection on every level, except for one thing. They seem to be extremely aware of their own embodiment of success to the extent that the focus is on them as potential problem solvers rather than on the problem being addressed. "I am here for you. Let me tell you how capable I am." They have checked all the in boxes on their sterling resumes. So don't disturb the ideal with your pedestrian needs or questions.
When my son had his tonsils removed at Child's Hospital, he was 5 years old. Child's hospital specialized in cleft palate surgery, which was performed when the child was about one year of age. So during the 4 days or so when my child was hospitalized, we saw a number of year-old babies who were patients, either pre-or post-surgery.
The routine was that the babies would be strapped in their high chairs and the nurses would wheel them with them, chatting and socializing with them, and stationing them in the doorways as they visited the rooms of other patients.
Parents then could stay with their children overnight, as I did for the several nights he was in the hospital. As I recall, the length of hospitalization for post palate surgery was quite a bit longer, maybe 10-12 days or so. As a result, many parents could not be present for much of their child's hospital stay.
Those babies had to be carefully observed during their recovery period, and measures were taken to keep them from crying, which could adversely affect their surgical repairs. And it is true that the babies were mostly silent; I never heard them cry, thanks to the constant attention of the nurses.
The protocol was that unless the parent(s) could stay with their child for the entire duration of the hospital stay, they were not to visit at all, the reason being that the child would cry when the parent left.
I must retract the proclamation of my successful achievements posted earlier.
1) I thought I'd engaged the services of local contractor who came with impeccable recommendations.The fee agreed on seemed reasonable in today's market. But subsequent message applied what is called a Service Activation Fee of $100. That is in addition to the regular snow removal fee of $50. I am not familiar with that type of fee for my type of service. So matter is unresolved.
2) Based on past history, and potential future need, I would take some comfort in knowing the best path to take if I think I'm having a cardiac emergency. If 911 Emergency Responders are mandated to take patient to closest hospital, Samaritan, and the cardiology doctors in Troy (CCA) no longer (after Jan, 1) treat cardiac emergencies--catheterization lab or cardiac inpatient services---at Samaritan, transferring this type of care to AMC or St. Peter's, what happens? I asked my new highly skilled, highly recommended, very personable young interventional cardiologist what route would be taken in transferring patient to a hospital for emergency care, and he said not to think about it. The banner announcement on CCA's post reads: "WHEN IT'S YOUR HEART, YOU JUST CAN'T WAIT." Knowing time is of the essence, I posed my question on the CCA website, through 2 different channels, and received no response. I attempted to reach Samaritan with this question, and no response.
3) I scheduled an appointment with my heating system supply company. I told them my furnace has been leaking fuel oil starting when it was 2 years old, and despite numerous and costly repairs and parts replacement, the leakage continues. I asked for a service visit with the annual cleaning and also requested that the technician evaluate the furnace to see it it needed replacement as was previously stated, before and during the cycle of repairs. The technician arrived, diligently listened to my recounting of the issue, went downstairs, confronted the furnace for more than 2 hours, during which time he reviewed initial complaint, called the manufacturer and other providers. He (1) said the leakage was a matter of concern, and (2) that he had found and corrected the cause, and (3) the furnace did NOT need replacing. It just turned 10 years old. I was relieved. Today, my son checked the furnace, and it is STILL LEAKING.
There are still a few other nagging or niggling issues to contend with, but enough failures for now.
I do rejoice that my car passed inspecton, and the turkey was delectable.
You need to address this issue. You realize you are reaching the end of your designated time on earth, and there are matters you need to address. You may have drawn up your will, settled matters of inheritance and asset distribution, and even arranged for the disposition of your mortal coil. But you should know the burden you may still inflict on your family members if you don't take my advice.
Such a scolding paraphrases an article I read several months ago, whether in a magazine, newspaper, or online, I don't recall. The author was citing the difficulties she had encountered while attempting to dispose of her late mother's personal possessions. She was advising senior citizens of the importance of downsizing what they owned and of sorting the worthwhile thngs out before the home was divested of all their stuff. This is what happened to her, the daughter:
She had to go through and clear the home of her mother's personal things, closets full of clothes, and files and boxes of paperwork, none of which was needed any longer.She had to take the time to go to the home and was intending to just bundle up all the clothing and either donate or dispose of it, I don't recall. But, as she was about to put a coat into the disposal bag, she absentmindedly stuck her hand into a pocket---and came across a $50 bill, evidently forgotten about by the deceased. That meant she now had to examine all the clothing in case there was more cash which the owner had failed to remove.
What was destined to be even more time consuming and painstaking was that when she scanned through a box of old papers prior to incinerating them, she found, nestled in the file folders, a vintage gold wristwatch, dropped and forgotten there probably years before.
Thus, the author's message is that it is inconsiderate of old timers not to consider what might happen if they don't do their due diligence and tend to these matters instead of leaving such sorting out to others, who have to adjust their busy schedules for something that would be unnecessary if the correct measures had already been taken. So, sort stuff, Old woman or Old Man. Otherwise, something of value, cash, jewelry, etc. might be thrown in the trash.
I would tell this author while her experience might have been true, her reasoning is a misapprehension. If the forgotten cash and watch had been thrown away, even destroyed, what difference would it make if nobody knew it existed in the first place. These were items forgotten by all; there was no expectation of recovery of loss. You can't miss something that was never in the realm of your existence. Just toss the stuff away.
