What is a URL?

What is a URL?

Too late the phalarope

So when I was a little kid, I wanted to grow up to be a person who uttered famous quotations. I outgrew that lost hope, don't even text or tweet or submit to You Tube, so I guess I'll never be famous. But my later version of the ideal vocation would have ultimately turned out to be even more ill-fated. You see, I read this article in I think it was The Atlantic about a man who was an expert on the works of William Shakespeare. As I recall, he lived in an upscale apartment, probably in NYC, and people from all over the country and indeed the world consulted him whenever they needed an appropriate quotation from the works of Shakespeare. College professors, business tycoons, clergymen, politicians, speakers from all walks of life who wanted a dignified, salient addition to their speeches or articles would ask this man who knew Shakespeare backward and forward, and who could be counted on to provide them with exactly the reference they were looking for. He was immensely respected for his knowledge, and made a good living for providing the sought-after quotation for the proper event. I happened to own The Complete Works of Shakespeare, and told my young self that if that job hadn't already been taken, I could have pretty much memorized a great deal of Shakespeare's works, and was convinced I could have matched an apt quotation to whatever situation was asked for. I thought I would have loved that job. I should have invented google instead.

Good Thing I Didn't Follow Through

When I was a child and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I always answered that I didn't know. Nobody had much back then, including hope, and our family fit in that mold; it would have seemed presumptuous and immodest to act as if we could control our future. So I said I had no idea but I really did have a secret aspiration. I wanted to be in one of the few books our family owned, and that was Bartlett's Familiar Quotations. My father was a history buff. He was born at the end of the 19th Century, and was pretty much an expert on all of the history as was then recorded in the textbooks of the day. He used to ask us kids who said "Don't give up the ship, I only regret I have but one life to give for my country, War is hell." I figured that if I had been in any one of those situations, I might have come up with that exact quote, or maybe even a better one that would be worth inclusion in Bartlett's book. The only one I wasn't sure of was "Don't fire til you see the whites of their eyes." I didn't think I could have come up with that one.

A Loss for Words

New words come into our language, and are added to the dictionaries: staycation, jeggings, LOL, tweetup, unfriend, roadkill. And some are inevitably lost or listed as archaic, obsolete, etc. I can think of one perfectly good word which is neither archaic or outdated in meaning, but is hardly ever used any more. The word is "frightening." Whereas the word once was used to describe a harrowing or unsettling experience or scenario, anything formerly considered frightening is now referred to as "scary." A scary tsunami, the scary prospect of nuclear fallout, a victim of a dreadful assault as having lived through a scary experience. Once scary was used in relation to little children and Halloween sights, or for a little animal character in children's literature being lost in a scary woods. Sure, frightening has 3 syllables instead of scary's 2, and 11 letters instead of 5, but is it worth sacrificing the dignity of language for the minimal savings of time or print? Personally, I find it somewhat incongruous and a little humorous when a dignified-looking spokesperson for some agency or another labels a major threat to our economy or world peace or survival of the planet as being "scary." BOO!

Where the sidewalk ended

I was walking along the sidewalk in my town, near the big yellow house across from what used to be the Catholic church, but now in business as "The Brick Elephant." I was looking down briefly at some cards in my hand, when I suddenly fell into a pit where the sidewalk had been taken up, ostensibly for repair, but a lot of time had passed. The orange warning cones had been removed, if indeed they'd ever been placed there. The hole was deep, several feet, and I landed on my feet. I felt a shock in both ankles and a feeling of pressure in the back of my head, but otherwise was unharmed.

Swimming to Fishphobia

There were fish in the room, all over the room, apparently swimming in air, medium sized fish they were. Also, one small yellow kitten. Signs were posted around the room, from all points of view. "Don't look," they warned. I looked anyway of course, although out of the side of my eye. The kitten was being swallowed by one of the fishes, hardly big enough to swallow it all at once, but working on it.

Just plain lost

Question: Do you know anyone named Lynn, who graduated in 2009? I found a set of keys with that info on the ring.

Reply: Yes, I know a girl named Lynn who graduated from HS in 2009. She drives and lives in the Village.
Day later : Did the keys belong to her (above)?

Response from Questioner: No, they weren't hers. We brought them to Lost & Found.